She's right, of course -- it's unseemly to yell at referees for any number of reasons. And while I really don't do it often, her point is I shouldn't do it, ever. I know that. But sometimes I just can't help myself. Hey, I'm human. And I will say, in my defense, that the refs have to be pretty bad for me to yell at them.
Usually I only yell at football refs, and occasionally, lacrosse refs, for some reason. I rarely yell at basketball referees. Inside a gym, with fewer people watching, somehow I don't feel as comfortable calling a referee out for every mistake. Perhaps it's because my nephew is a basketball ref, and I realize that referees are people too. I don't know.
Last week, though, it was hard to remain calm as I watched while the two referees working my son's CYO league basketball game allowed the game to get completely out of control. The opposing team was extremely physical, and the referees took the approach where they "let the kids play.''
At the youth level, I always prefer referees call a tighter game, so as to teach the kids what is a foul and what isn't. But allowing some physical play is fine, as long as the referees A) remember to let both teams' kids play, and B) at some point, take control and don't allow the physicality to reach a level where the game becomes dangerous to the participants.
The two referees at the game in question did neither of those things in this particular instance. The opposing team spent the entire game pushing, bumping and banging my son's team and it wasn't long before my son's team -- which has three football players on it -- decided to push and bump and bang back.
The problem is, as the contact got more and more intense, the conditions got more and more dangerous for the players. At one point, my son swiped at the ball after a rebound on a missed free throw and fouled an opposing player. The player swung his elbow -- violently -- at my son, and grazed him with a glancing blow on his jaw. He wasn't injured, thank goodness, but he's the only one that got charged with a foul on that play.
And that's where the game went completely off the rails.
My son's coach began to argue with the referees, not protesting the foul call against my son, but the lack of a call on the elbow that the opposing player threw at him. Eventually, the coach got a technical. And then a second technical, which meant he was ejected. The other team hit a bunch of foul shots in the sequence and a tight game began to slip away. That led to things getting even more physical. Thankfully, no one got hurt, but things got so bad that the referees ended the game with 16 seconds still left on the clock.
But that wasn't the end of it. Our coach called the league to complain about the officials, but the league decided to go along with the referees' report, which painted our team as the aggressors. The league suspended our coach for two games and two of our players got two-game suspensions as well, because they were assessed technical fouls in the game. The technicals came late in the game, as the refs were no doubt trying to rein in the players on both teams. At that point it was too late; the game was already out of control.
By the way, in case you're wondering, I didn't yell at the refs -- much.
If I could send a message to the two referees that I believe allowed all this chaos to occur, here's what I would tell them: Call fouls when you see them. By doing that, you set the tone and let the kids know what will and won't be tolerated. That's the best way to keep everybody safe on the court, field, or ice: If you do that, I promise, I'll keep trying to stop yelling at you.
The two referees at the game in question did neither of those things in this particular instance. The opposing team spent the entire game pushing, bumping and banging my son's team and it wasn't long before my son's team -- which has three football players on it -- decided to push and bump and bang back.
The problem is, as the contact got more and more intense, the conditions got more and more dangerous for the players. At one point, my son swiped at the ball after a rebound on a missed free throw and fouled an opposing player. The player swung his elbow -- violently -- at my son, and grazed him with a glancing blow on his jaw. He wasn't injured, thank goodness, but he's the only one that got charged with a foul on that play.
And that's where the game went completely off the rails.
My son's coach began to argue with the referees, not protesting the foul call against my son, but the lack of a call on the elbow that the opposing player threw at him. Eventually, the coach got a technical. And then a second technical, which meant he was ejected. The other team hit a bunch of foul shots in the sequence and a tight game began to slip away. That led to things getting even more physical. Thankfully, no one got hurt, but things got so bad that the referees ended the game with 16 seconds still left on the clock.
But that wasn't the end of it. Our coach called the league to complain about the officials, but the league decided to go along with the referees' report, which painted our team as the aggressors. The league suspended our coach for two games and two of our players got two-game suspensions as well, because they were assessed technical fouls in the game. The technicals came late in the game, as the refs were no doubt trying to rein in the players on both teams. At that point it was too late; the game was already out of control.
By the way, in case you're wondering, I didn't yell at the refs -- much.
If I could send a message to the two referees that I believe allowed all this chaos to occur, here's what I would tell them: Call fouls when you see them. By doing that, you set the tone and let the kids know what will and won't be tolerated. That's the best way to keep everybody safe on the court, field, or ice: If you do that, I promise, I'll keep trying to stop yelling at you.
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